


real good loving, line up your wrists

by neilwrites



Series: My body's callin', callin' [1]
Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: 69 (Sex Position), Alternate Universe - Gender Changes, Alternate Universe - Office, F/F, Female Neil Josten/Female Andrew Minyard, Gender or Sex Swap, Light Dom/sub, Oral Sex, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, Scissoring, Vaginal Fingering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-03
Updated: 2021-01-03
Packaged: 2021-03-13 17:07:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28531932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neilwrites/pseuds/neilwrites
Summary: Andrea hums and stares at Nell. For a long time. Too long. Nell’s brain is trying to tell her something, but it’s taking a little while.Andrea’s eyes travel down Nell’s body appreciatively, and Nell is choking on her soda.“No way,” she says.Andrea bites her bottom lip. She hums again.“But,” Nell sputters, “You don’t even like me!”“You’re right,” Andrea says, tilting her head to the side, showing off her long neck, which is the last thing Nell should be focussing on. “That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t eat you out.”
Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Series: My body's callin', callin' [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2090088
Comments: 24
Kudos: 211





	real good loving, line up your wrists

**Author's Note:**

> a few weeks ago i said 'wouldn't it be funny to write a short crack fic about my own job, haha'  
> somehow, and i really, really do not know how this happened, that small crack fic turned into 18k of lesbian porn, and me growing so intensely attached to these characters(*) it sort of feels life-changing... i do hope you enjoy
> 
> so many thankley dankleys to my sprinting crew, because without their support and chants of 'pussy power!' this fic would never have been finished, and what a shame that would be
> 
> your pal,  
> neil

Nell drops her head to her desk as she marks the third mistake on just as many pages in an eight-hundred-page book. According to her audit report, she needs to check at least a hundred more pages, so this looks to be a long and difficult project. It would be okay if the mistakes she was finding didn’t require input from her worst enemy.

Enemy might be a strong word. Nemesis is stronger, and therefore more apt.

Andrea Minyard is somewhat of an expert on the legal books in the publishing house, and  _ the  _ person to talk to when the article numbers or any other legal term Nell couldn’t care less about is giving anyone trouble. Unfortunately for Nell, that happens quite often. Three times so far in this book, as a matter of fact.

She sighs, lifts her forehead from the edge of her desk, checks to see if Andrea’s at her desk, and starts drafting her email.

_ Dear esteemed coworker whose name escapes me, _

_ Could you take a look at the screenshots I’ve attached, as I would prefer not to blow my brains out of my skull right here on the carpet? I know some of the cleaning crew and that would be cruel. _

_ Hoping you are feeling quite terrible, _

_ Nell Josten _

It takes a good twenty minutes for Andrea to get back to her, in which Nell goes to refill her water bottle, does not look in Andrea’s direction either on her way there or back and stops to tell Kevin he missed a spot while shaving that morning even though he didn’t.

Her inbox is blinking at her when she gets back to her desk.

_ Hello Satan, _

_ My name is in my email address, but if you cannot remember it, I will accept ‘Miss’, ‘Overlord’ or ‘Drew’ if we are friends. As we are not, I shall settle for ‘Overlord’. _

_ Replies to the errors are attached. If you have any further questions, be sure to direct them to literally anyone else. _

_ “Sincerely” _

_ A. Minyard _

Nell hides her snort just in case Andrea could hear and logs the mistakes before continuing her work. 

It’s been three years since Nell started working here, joining the audit team at Foxhole Publishing on Kevin’s recommendation, who she knew in school until they lost touch for a few years before reconnecting online over their shared love of Exy.

He knew of an opening and told his superior, who just so happens to be his dad, that Nell would be a great fit. Nell was between jobs, and, in this economy, would take anything that would help her pay her rent.

It’s there that she met Andrea Minyard, who turned out to be Kevin’s best friend ever  _ since  _ he and Nell lost touch, and who looked at Nell like she personally killed her mother.

Nell’s a big girl, so she ignored Andrea’s stinkeye and continued to get to know the rest of the team better, quickly learning a lot of them were idiots.

On good days, Nell likes to think Andrea’s warming up to her; when the sarcasm isn’t quite as snarky as usual, when she doesn’t take the last complimentary cookie in the breakroom, when she actually looks up from her screen as Nell greets her in the morning.

One day she even told Nell “Nice coat,” when Nell had her cozy teddy bear jacket on, and Nell’s 75% sure she wasn’t kidding.

The emails, though, have not stopped. It started on a long and busy Friday afternoon, as a silly joke that could have easily turned into a lapse of judgment if it hadn’t been for Andrea’s willingness to go along with it. They have to send each other correspondence multiple times a week, even as they work on the same office floor, and it became a challenge to make it as funny and offensive while still polite as possible.

* * *

_ Greetings Minyard, _

_ Everyone in this office is incompetent, and no one has a copy of last week’s meeting notes when I was sick. Should I count you among them or are you better than all of them? _

_ Thankley dankley in advance. _

_ Nell _

…

_ Josten, _

_ Meeting notes in attachment, as I’m sure you knew I had them since I’m the one who has to take the damn things every week. I do admire your determination by asking everyone else before contacting me; as if anyone ever reads them. It brings me great joy imagining them all telling you no. _

_ Absolutely horrified to see you back in the office so soon, though. I had hoped to have some peace for another week. Do let me know if it was contagious, so I can send our most annoying coworkers your way. _

_ No regards, _

_ A. Minyard. _

…

_ Hello short stack, _

_ Don’t think I haven’t noticed the extremely high boots you’ve been wearing, fooling absolutely no one. Well. Maybe some people. Not me, though. I can see right through you, and on some days, straight up over you. _

_ Anyway, I have some more legal questions attached cause I’m starting to think the proofing department does not check emails coming from my address. _

_ Rawr, _

_ Nell _

…

_ Cornelia, _

_ Stop looking at my legs, pervert. You wish you could pull these boots off.  _

_ I know someone in the proofing department and they confirmed to me they ignore your messages on purpose. I sent them flowers. _

_ Answers in attachment, one of which you really should know by now, honestly. _

_ Later loser. _

_ A. Minyard _

…

_ Sweet Christ, never call me that ever again, I just came back from a quick trip to the bathroom because you made me hurl. _

_ Tally ho, _

_ Nell _

* * *

Ever since Nell made the mistake of noticing Andrea’s new platform boots, she hasn’t been able to look away.

She wears them quite often, especially now that it’s getting colder outside and despite the fact that they absolutely do not qualify as appropriate office wear. Every higher up seems to be too scared of her to tell her off, Nell is pretty sure. 

It wouldn’t be so annoying if Andrea didn’t realize the effect they had on Nell, but unfortunately, even when Nell thinks she’s being subtle, Andrea’s right there to smirk at her, catching her in the act.

Nothing is worse than the day Andrea shows up at work wearing a skirt, though.

Nell barely remembers to close her mouth around the bite of cookie when Andrea walks into the breakroom.

“What the hell are you wearing,” Nell says before thinking, but luckily after swallowing her mouthful.

Andrea just raises an eyebrow, which should not look that good. Honestly, it’s quite rude.

Kevin, who had been talking to Nell before she got distracted, clears his throat.

“Morning, Drew. Did you have a nice weekend?”

“Hmm,” Andrea grumbles. “Washing machine broke.”

Andrea snaps her fingers in front of Nell’s face, who had been busy staring at Andrea’s exposed thighs.

She swallows her instinct to ask her if she isn’t cold, too afraid of what that topic of conversation could turn into, and gulps down her tea.

“You could come over and use mine,” Kevin offers, and Nell uses the opportunity to escape back to her desk.

* * *

Nell’s in the building’s cafeteria munching on her lunch, which consists of mostly pasta but has a dressing, and is, therefore, a salad, when Andrea drops into the seat in front of her.

It’s not the first time Andrea’s at their table, since she’s close friends with Kevin, but Kevin isn’t here yet. Andrea never joins Nell without Kevin there.

“Uh,” Nell says. “Hi.”

Andrea nods and tucks into her sandwich.

“Washing machine fixed?” Nell asks. Andrea started wearing pants again. It is a perfectly normal thing to notice about your coworker.

Andrea licks some sauce off her fingertip before replying, “Got it replaced. They don’t give me the mediocre bucks for nothing.”

Nell would think of a joke to say back, but then she’s distracted.

“Wow, aren’t those annoying when you’re typing?” Nell asks, pointing at Andrea’s long manicured nails, painted a matte black and looking very pointy.

Andrea shrugs. “You get used to it.”

“Ah,” Nell winces. “What happened to those two, did they snap off?”

Andrea looks at the significantly shorter nails on her pointer and middle finger on her right hand before looking back up at Nell, a strange look in her eyes.

“No, those are on purpose,” she says.

“Huh. So you can use your phone?”

Andrea scoffs before stilling. “Nell,” she says. “Tell me you are not this innocent.”

Well. Now here’s a dilemma. Does she go along with it and pretend she knows what Andrea means, which could be embarrassing when found out, or does she admit to not knowing, which could also be embarrassing and used as ammo against her?

She’s really curious, though.

“What if, uh…” Nell says, stirring her salad with her fork idly. “What if I am that innocent?”

Andrea looks like she’s fighting back a smile, but it doesn’t look mean, really.

“You should google it,” she says, before quickly adding, “not on your work laptop. Do it on your phone or something.”

Now that’s even more confusing. Why wouldn’t she be allowed to look it up on her work laptop?

She’s ready to start arguing, but then Kevin shows up with an actual salad and a bad attitude, so Nell shelves the thought for later.

* * *

Nell finds out what the fingers mean. She felt like an absolute idiot typing it into google, then felt herself turn entirely red when she found the answer, but also very lucky she decided to wait until she was home to do so.

She’s determined not to let Andrea know it had any sort of effect on her, so she doesn’t mention it again. How would she even do that anyway, just offhandedly say, “Oh hey, figured out your nails are short because you like to finger women.” No, that’s a one-way ticket to the HR department.

What she does do, though, which is just as dumb, in retrospect, is ask Andrea when they’re both waiting in the copy room, “So, you and Kevin aren’t…”

Andrea just blinks at her.

Nell swallows nervously. “You know, because of the…” She flaps her hand around. “Nails.”

Andrea smirks and leans against the wall, crossing her legs and drawing Nell’s attention back to her boots.

Those fucking boots.

“No,” Andrea says. “You think I’d date  _ that _ ?” She points behind her where Kevin is wrestling with his computer’s power cord.

Nell shrugs and tries not to feel dumb for even thinking it was plausible. 

“That’s not who I use my fingers on,” Andrea says, leaning over Nell to reach for some paperwork on the shelf, brushing her arm against hers.

“Oh,” Nell says. “That’s cool.” She winces.

Andrea nods. “Very.”

“Anyway, I uh…” Nell grabs her copies. “Toodles.”

She walks away at a completely normal pace, ignoring the goosebumps on the arm Andrea leaned against.

* * *

It’s the end of the busiest time of year at the publishing house when most books that need to come out have passed by the audit team, and they can all start to calm down from the extreme pressure. Kevin had asked everyone on the team to join in on an after-work drink, but given that it was Kevin, and his face and general demeanor scare people, only Andrea, Kevin, and Nell turn up at Eden’s.

Neither of them is very displeased by this outcome, and Kevin and Nell grab a table while Andrea goes to order them some drinks.

The bar is cozy, not too dark to feel oppressive, and not too loud so you can still talk over the music, making sure Nell doesn’t feel the need to run away from the entire situation to her empty, quiet flat where she finds peace.

When Andrea comes back, she drops a soda can in front of Nell, a whiskey in front of Kevin, and something clear that Nell assumes to be vodka in front of her own seat.

Nell hadn’t realized it while sitting down, but taking her seat opposite Kevin meant Andrea would sit beside either one of them, and she definitely hadn’t expected it to be beside her.

She doesn’t usually like sitting too close to someone, very particular about her personal bubble and who’s allowed in it, but this doesn’t feel too bad, Nell’s surprised to find.

She knows Andrea isn’t the touchy-feely type herself, so she won’t have to worry about any surprise unwanted touches. They are close enough for Nell to pick up whiffs of Andrea’s perfume, and it’s a fight not to lean in further.

Kevin starts talking about his dad, which is enough to wake Nell from the strange sidetrack her brain took her on, and they talk about all types of shit while Kevin and Andrea get tipsy and Nell watches with a smile on her face.

Kevin excuses himself for a bathroom break, and Nell, who can’t blame this on the alcohol, says, “So about your nails.”

Andrea quirks her brow and smiles, showing off her scarily white teeth, knowing full well what this is about, and asks, “What about them?”

“Well, are you…” Nell starts, wonders if she’s really doing this, decides that yes, apparently she is, and continues, “Does that mean you’re seeing someone?”

It's only a slightly better question than “Do you have a girlfriend?” which would potentially expose Nell’s thought process far too much, and might end up with Andrea laughing in her face.

“Nothing much lately,” Andrea muses. “I was, but I haven’t seen her in a while.”

Nell frowns. “So why do you keep it up? Isn’t it awkward, or, I don’t know, unnecessary?”

Andrea shrugs. “I need to be ready if the situation changes.”

It takes Nell a minute.

“Oh,” she says. “So you’re, like, into someone? Or, I guess, waiting for someone?”

Andrea doesn’t say anything.

Nell briefly wonders how long Kevin could possibly need to piss for, before running her mouth even more.

“They’re crazy for passing you up,” Nell says, really clueless as to why she’s still talking. She doesn’t even like Andrea that much. Honestly.

Andrea hums and stares at Nell. For a long time. Too long. Nell’s brain is trying to tell her something, but it’s taking a little while.

Andrea’s eyes travel down Nell’s body appreciatively, and Nell is choking on her soda.

“No way,” she says.

Andrea bites her bottom lip. She hums again.

“But,” Nell sputters, “You don’t even like me!”

“You’re right,” Andrea says, tilting her head to the side, showing off her long neck, which is the last thing Nell should be focussing on. “That doesn’t mean I wouldn’t eat you out.”

Nell’s heart stops in her chest before doubling down into overdrive.

All she can do is stare incredulously at Andrea, who does not look embarrassed in the slightest.

“What?” She coughs out, losing the ability to process any thought that isn’t ‘ _ Andrea’s into me, in a  _ sex  _ way, and I don’t think I mind it at all. _ ’

Andrea shrugs and sips her drink. “Just saying.”

Kevin chooses that moment to return to the table, three new drinks in hand.

Nell grabs his whiskey before he even sits down and throws it back.

“What the fuck?” Kevin shrieks.

“It’s for your own good,” Nell says after she’s done pulling faces and shivering from the stronger than expected alcohol running down her throat. “Gotta sober up before you go home.”

She has no idea how she’s found the skill to carry on with normal conversation when her brain has imploded.

“I’m taking the bus,” Kevin whines.

“You don’t want to get caught for public indecency,” Andrea pipes up, making a blush rise up on Nell’s already hot cheeks.

“Right,” she squeaks.

Kevin, expectedly, doesn’t sober up fully. By the time they arrive at the bus stop for their respective rides, Andrea ensures she'll make sure he arrives home safely.

Nell’s bus gets there first, and after Kevin weakly gives her a high five, Nell says, “See you on Monday, Andrea.”

Nell can swear she sees Andrea smile, and then she replies, “Call me Drew.”

The doors close before Nell’s face, and she whispers to herself, “Drew.”

* * *

Nell would like to say things don’t get awkward after that, but not a single person would believe her. 

It’s like when you hear a word for the first time and suddenly it pops up around you everywhere. Nell can’t seem to escape Andrea.  _ Drew _ .

She sits right next to Nell at the team meeting. When Nell is leaving the bathroom, Drew is walking in. When Nell is grocery shopping after work, she spots Drew in the next aisle and immediately turns back. The paper towels can wait a week.

On a rainy Thursday night, Nell is working late at the office, surrounded by empty desks of coworkers who had the fortune of  _ not  _ dealing with the worst proofed book in human history that was meant to pass the audit hours ago. Nell’s been at this all day, correcting errors and coding them according to their checklist, stuck with her hands in her hair while her laptop overheats at the sheer task of having three pdfs open at the same time.

She swears when she sees the time when she finally sends off the email with the audit result. Then, she swears louder when Drew is suddenly standing in front of her.

“Hi,” she says. “You good?”

Nell can’t even fake it, she’s sure the anxiety and stress are visible all over her face.

“Yeah, I’m finally done, but I should have been home half an hour ago,” Nell says, rubbing her hands over her face, not giving a fuck if she’s smearing the makeup, if there’s even any left after the day she’s had.

She turns to look outside the window and sees it’s still chucking it down. It might even be cold enough for some of the rain to have turned into ice, and that’s gonna be a nightmare to ride over with her bike.

“I’ll drive you,’ Drew says, making Nell’s jaw drop. “Grab your things.”

“What— What about my bike?” She asks, putting away her laptop in her locker.

“I’ll put it in the trunk,” Drew says with a shrug, waiting just long enough for Nell to put her coat and scarf on before turning to leave. “You coming?”

“Fuck,” Nell says, running after her to catch the same elevator. “Thank you.”

Once outside, Drew ties her hair up in a short high ponytail, revealing an undercut Nell could probably salivate over.

It’s even harder not to once Drew grabs her bike and lifts it into the trunk of her car all by herself.

“Get in,” Drew says while maneuvering Nell’s bike so it’s secure for the ride. “Put your address in the GPS and turn the heating on.”

Everything happened so fast that Nell only has time to feel awkward about the situation once Drew opens the door and sits down in the driver’s seat, so close to Nell it heats her up faster than the car. 

“Ready to go?” Drew asks with a smirk before stepping on the gas, and Nell suddenly realizes she’s never seen anything hotter in her life than Drew switching gears and biting her bottom lip as she does it.

Afraid to make an embarrassing sound if she opens her mouth, she just stays quiet and crosses her legs awkwardly, squeezing her thighs together in what she hopes is a subtle way.

The radio is on, but Nell is not in a state of mind to take any of the music in, stuck between watching Drew drive and looking out the rain-covered window when she’s about to get caught staring at her.

Nell doesn’t even live that far, but the drive seems to go on forever. Not that she’s complaining much. When they do finally arrive, Nell doesn’t really know what to do.

Drew takes her bike out of the trunk and waits around while Nell locks it in front of her building. Is she supposed to invite Drew up? That seems a bit forward, and also her apartment is an absolute fucking mess. Besides, Drew probably has things to do too. Nell’s wasted enough of her time already.

“Do you, uh…” Nell starts, and panics under Drew’s attentive gaze. “You going to the Christmas party next week?”

“Sort of think I have to,” Drew says, rolling her eyes. “Wymack says my Christmas bonus depends on it.”

“Sounds like an HR violation,” Nell jokes and is weirdly proud to see Drew chuckle.

“So yes,” Drew clarifies. “You will see me there.”

Nell nods, and when the silence lingers, though not awkwardly, she finally reaches out to open the door to her building.

“Wear something pretty,” Drew says before stepping into her car, leaving Nell a blushing mess on her doorstep.

* * *

Nell spends far too much time getting ready for the party. She puts her hair in a complicated updo after watching a tutorial on how to do it three times, then decides to use the glitter she got for her birthday to subtly dust on her eyelids. After mascara and liner, she dabs on some tinted lip balm before making her way to her dresser. 

She doesn’t have a lot of fancy lingerie, but when you’re friends with Allison Reynolds, there is no way you don’t end up with frilly panties and bras, whether you like it or not. She picks out a dark red combo to fit the theme and wonders if she’s brave enough to add the matching garter belt.

It  _ is _ really pretty, with lace and mesh patterns, and Nell hasn’t had the opportunity to wear it before, so really, this is a perfect time. Even if nothing happens tonight, it won’t matter, and Nell can just feel sexy in it for herself. She grabs some stockings and rolls them on, then attaches them to the belt. She goes to check herself out in the mirror and can’t deny she looks good. The heels she’s dreading to wear all night make the outfit even better, and Nell does a turn to look at herself from all angles.

The frilly panties hug the soft curve of her ass, and the cups on the bra are see-through mesh tinted red, doing absolutely nothing to hide her hard nipples. 

Nell shakes her head to turn off her horny brain. She hasn’t even seen Drew yet and she’s in this much of a state.

She’d planned to wear a cozy warm sweater to the party, but after talking to Drew last week, Nell changed her mind. Now, she’s pulling a red satin dress out of her closet, and when she puts it on, it hugs her at the waist but is loose enough to hide the shape of her underwear, and long enough to cover the tops of her stockings.

Nell’s phone pings with a text from Kevin, announcing his arrival outside, ready to drive them both to the party location.

Once they get there, Nell realizes that while she was worried about her own outfit, she didn’t spend nearly enough time thinking about what Drew would be wearing. And how it would affect her.

She’s surrounded by coworkers and their spouses or partners, servers carrying around glasses of champagne and orange juice, far too many Christmas decorations in one singular room but all Nell can focus on is Drew.

She’s standing near the Christmas tree, loosely holding a glass of champagne, looking fucking gorgeous. The boots, because of course she’s found a way to wear the boots, are tightened overtop some skinny black ripped jeans, showing small stretches of thigh that Nell’s eyes linger on. But how could she even keep her gaze there when loosely tucked into the high-waisted pants, Drew is wearing a see-through black blouse that reveals a lacy black bra underneath, along with both her arms absolutely  _ covered  _ in tattoos. Sure, Drew usually wears long-sleeved shirts to the office, but Nell never could have dreamed it was to hide all of  _ this _ .

She’s unashamed in her staring, needing a moment to take it all in. Then, as she finally looks at Drew’s face, she’s staring right back at her, a cheeky smile on her crimson lips.

Nell walks over in a daze, not entirely sure where the glass in her hand came from, but Kevin has disappeared from her side so maybe he had something to do with that.

“Fancy seeing you here,” Drew says, tipping her glass.

Nell laughs nervously and suddenly feels like she’s in way over her head.

“Do you, uh…” She takes a sip and is glad to find Kevin gave her orange juice. “You like what I’m wearing?”

“Hmm,” Drew says, giving her a once over. “Pretty.”

Nell blushes and is thankful for the somewhat dimmed lighting in this place.

Kevin joins them then, adamant about introducing them to some people from the sales department, and Nell couldn’t care less on a normal day, let alone when she can feel Drew’s hot gaze on her.

They don’t get left alone for a good hour, which is fine, since Kevin is their closest friend and they are celebrating a year well-worked. Also, if they had been left alone, Nell’s pretty sure they wouldn’t be hanging around the office Christmas party for very long.

Some department heads give speeches, Wymack only says “Nice work. Merry Christmas,” and then there’s a DJ for some reason, making people clear the middle of the room for the weirdos to start dancing.

Nell excuses herself to the bathroom, and cracks open the small window to let some fresh air in. She feels overwhelmed in a good way, skin hot with attention, and only slightly nervous.

When she walks back out, Drew’s sitting at one of the abandoned tables in a corner, on the singular chair left. Since there aren’t any other chairs in the room, Nell guesses Drew probably commandeered one before they were all taken out. That or she stole one from a different room.

Drew’s eyes find her again, and Nell grabs a glass of champagne from a server passing by, then downs it before walking over to her.

“There are no more chairs,” she says, cocking her hip.

Drew slides her chair back. “There’s a seat right here.”

Nell blushes again, but she won’t turn down the offer, and sits sideways on Drew’s lap, crossing her legs.

Drew wraps an arm around her waist, and Nell can feel the heat of it through her dress, so she fights to hold back any embarrassing sounds she might make.

“Having fun?” Drew asks, and Nell has to laugh at the question she knows Drew doesn’t give a shit about.

“Hmm,” she nods, laying her own arm across Drew’s shoulder, for good balance, of course. She fiddles with the fabric of Drew’s blouse, pressing her fingertips where she can spot birthmarks speckled in between the ink. “You?”

“Could be better,” Drew says, sliding her hand from Nell’s waist to slightly lower, less proper, but it’s hidden underneath the table and Nell certainly won’t complain.

“What, uh…” Nell swallows thickly and can’t look away from Drew’s heavy gaze. “What could make it better?”

Drew’s hand slides down further until she tugs at the fabric of Nell’s dress, making Nell lift up a little so it’s no longer stuck between her ass and Drew’s thighs, yet still covering her front.

Once Drew has free rein, her hand slips underneath Nell’s dress, and at the first touch of her fingers on Nell’s bare thigh, Nell whimpers.

Drew’s fingers find the top of Nell’s stockings, and Nell watches her face change in surprise when she discovers the clips attaching them to her garter belt. Her hand follows the satin strips up to find the lacy belt sitting in her waistline, and she splays her hand low on Nell’s quivering stomach.

If Drew’s hand were to travel a bit lower, this would go into extremely dangerous territory, but Nell, stuck under Drew’s attentive eyes, can’t seem to find it in herself to care.

“Did you dress up for me?” Drew murmurs, sliding her hand back to Nell’s thigh, making Nell uncross them so she can reach better to graze her inner thigh.

Nell nods and bites her lower lip, shaking at Drew’s fingers touching the sensitive skin.

“And why did you do that?” The tips of Drew’s nails gently press into Nell’s skin, and she wishes they would leave marks.

Nell briefly looks around her to check if anyone is paying attention to them, but Drew’s left index finger tips Nell’s chin back to her.

“Because you asked me to,” Nell finally answers, blush high on her cheeks. “And…”

“Hmm?” Drew asks, shifting her hand on Nell’s skin until it’s stuck in between her thighs, Nell squeezing them close.

“I want you to—,” Nell pauses when someone passes their table. “I want you to show me.”

“Show you what, baby?” Drew murmurs close to Nell’s ear.

Nell closes her eyes and whines softly. “You said, you said you wanted to…”

Drew chuckles softly in Nell’s ear. “Oh, I see.”

Nell opens her eyes and suddenly feels embarrassed. “I mean, if you still want to. Unless you were joking. Sorry if that’s—”

“Shh,” Drew shushes her and reminds her where her hand is by giving her a few soothing strokes. “I want to. What do you say we get out of here?”

Nell nods gratefully. “Let’s go.”

Nell is shaky on her feet when she finally gets up after making sure her dress looks decent, and Drew steadies her with her arm. She continues to let Nell lean on her to go grab their coats, and with one arm supporting her, she sends off a text.

“Told Kevin we’re leaving so he doesn’t worry,” she says. “You ready?”

Nell nods again, not sure she can manage words right now and follows Drew to her car.

Drew keeps her hand on Nell’s thigh for the majority of the drive to her apartment, which helps soothe Nell’s nerves and works her up at the same time.

She’s not paying attention in the slightest to Drew’s building, which floor she’s on, what number apartment she’s at. All she knows is when they walk in and Drew closes the door behind her, she turns and pushes Nell up against it and finally kisses her.

Nell moans when their lips finally touch, when Drew’s hands land on her waist, shift down to caress her hips and her ass through the silk. Drew licks inside and Nell gladly lets her, sucks on her tongue, and whines when Drew pulls back to suck on Nell’s bottom lip instead. She takes hold of Drew’s hair to get her back where she wants her, and Drew grabs Nell’s wrists, pushing them up against the wall beside her head.

Nell pants heavily while Drew stares at her, daring her to move as she gives Nell small pecks on the lips, making Nell feel like she’s being punished but the tight grip on her wrists is so sexy she can’t even complain.

Well, she can push back a little. It wouldn’t be any fun if she just relented right away.

She can feel how heavy she’s breathing, knows her chest is moving with her deep breaths, and she pushes her body up against Drew.

“Kiss me,” she demands, and Drew just tsks and presses her lips against Nell’s temple.

Nell knocks her head back into the door petulantly and changes tactics. 

“Would you kiss me?” she asks, begging with her eyes and she knows she’s hit gold when she sees the look in Drew’s eyes change.

Drew loosens her grip on Nell’s wrists only to ruck up her dress and grab hold of her thighs, pulling them up so Nell can wrap them around Drew’s waist, squeaking and crossing her arms behind Drew’s neck to hold on tight.

Drew’s fingers glide over Nell’s thighs, then work their way under the straps of the garter belt currently digging into her flesh.

Nell’s fingers scratch at Drew’s undercut and she kisses her, gives gentle nips at her lips and demands attention from Drew’s in return, moans when she gets her way, whines when she doesn’t.

Drew’s nails on her thighs remind her how unfair it is that Drew’s fully dressed, so she tugs at the fabric and demands, “Off, off now.”

Drew bites at her lip, then drops her safely back on the ground before calmly unbuttoning her blouse while Nell shakes on her feet.

She kicks off her heels while Drew undoes the laces on her  _ fucking boots _ , and Nell hides a whimper.

She doesn’t resist when Drew walks over and pulls up the dress completely, leaving Nell in her lingerie against the hallway door.

Drew takes a minute to just stare at her, long enough for Nell to grow self-conscious, fighting the urge to hide her body and her scars, but that all disappears when Drew looks at her with hunger in her eyes, and she cups Nell’s jaw and kisses her, then tugs her along towards her bedroom.

“Nell,” she says, grazing a hand through Nell’s loosened curls. “What do you like?”

“Uh,” Nell says, trying not to squirm. “I don’t… Uhm. I don’t know.”

Drew kisses her, and it feels like reassurance. She keeps a loose hold on Nell’s hip. “That’s okay. This your first time?”

Nell shakes her head. “Not uh… Not first. Or, well… With a woman, yes.”

Drew nods, and again, Nell doesn’t feel awkward at all.

“It wasn’t good?” Drew asks. “With the guys?”

“Guy,” Nell clarifies. “And no, I guess I wasn’t, I don’t know, doing it right? It wasn’t very good for me.”

“Sounds to me like he couldn’t do his job,” Drew says, changing her grip to Nell’s ass, dipping a few fingers under the fabric of her panties to tug her closer.

“No, I—, Nell shrugs. “I wasn’t prepared—”

“Baby,” Drew shushes her with a finger on Nell’s lips. “You didn’t do anything wrong. That asshole just didn’t know how to treat you.”

Nell looks to the floor until Drew tilts her chin up.

“And you do?”

Drew grins and Nell shivers with want.

“Get on the bed.”

The command hits Nell right in her gut, and she quickly complies, crawling on Drew’s mattress and black sheets.

When she turns around and gets comfortable against the pillows, it’s to the sight of Drew crawling over top of her, the button and zip of her jeans undone revealing the waistband of her own black lace panties.

Drew kisses her, laying down on top of her and comforting Nell with her weight, and Nell breathes out and relaxes into it.

“You okay?” Drew asks after a few seconds, and when Nell nods, she gets up to tug her tight jeans off, and she unclips her bra, then drops that too.

Nell rubs her thighs together while watching her, and Drew smirks since she knows exactly what she’s doing. 

When Drew takes too long to come back, Nell whines and reaches her arms out towards her.

Drew settles back on top of her, sitting up on Nell’s thighs, and asks, “Can I undress you?”

Nell nods shakily and lifts up when directed. Drew unhooks and takes off her bra, undoes the clips on Nell’s stockings, and rubs her thighs soothingly before rolling down the thigh highs. 

Nell bites her bottom lip as Drew keeps going, undoes the garter belt and throws that off the side too, then pauses at Nell’s panties.

“Still okay?”

Filled with sudden determination, Nell nods and starts pushing the panties down, then watches as Drew pulls them off her legs completely, then takes off her own too.

Now, completely bare with each other, Nell smiles cheekily and pulls Drew closer for a kiss. When she complies, she tugs Drew down until they’re lying on top of each other, breasts pressed together skin to skin as she holds her close and whispers, “Don’t be gentle with me.”

Drew sucks on her lip, bites and tugs until it slips out from between her teeth. “I won’t.” She kisses Nell with a groan and a promise. “I won’t be gentle.”

Her hands land on Nell’s breasts, cupping them, teasing the nipples between her fingers, and landing a kiss right overtop while Nell has trouble breathing, shivering at the attention.

Once Nell is whining for more touch, Drew raises up on her knees a little and slowly, with a featherlight touch, trails her fingers from Nell’s bottom lip down to her neck, between her breasts, over the hollow of her stomach lined with marks from the past, and then slips in between her legs. Her fingers rub Nell’s folds, spread the wet and straight heat they find, and Drew says, “I’ll show you what you like.”

She pushes Nell’s legs open and settles down between them with her upper half leaning over Nell, her arm resting next to Nell’s head, keeping eye contact.

With her thumb she finds Nell’s clit and rubs against it, circles around it, making Nell jolt.

“Have you done this to yourself before?”

“Fuck,” Nell whispers, grabbing hold of Drew’s arm beside her. “Yes, but— It didn’t feel like that.”

Drew grins and continues circling, making Nell’s eyes roll backward with the mind-numbing pleasure suddenly coursing through her.

“You’ve been missing out,” Drew says, nosing at Nell’s stretched out neck. “You’re so responsive.”

Nell squeezes her eyes shut when Drew’s onslaught continues, managing to keep rubbing her exactly where she needs it until she has to push her hand away.

Drew kisses behind her ear. “Can I finger you?”

“I— Yes, if you can,” Nell blushes.

“Relax, baby,” Drew says, dipping her fingers down and dragging them over Nell’s slick entrance. She spreads Nell’s lips and checks to see if she’s still comfortable, and at her shaky nod, Drew rubs her hand over Nell’s slit and pushes her middle finger inside.

She keeps going until it’s in to the knuckle and waits for Nell to adjust.

Again, when Nell nods, Drew curls her finger and wiggles it around, dragging across her walls until it hits something that makes Nell moan suddenly.

“I— Fuck—”

Drew hums and moves her finger in that same way, and Nell’s back arches off the bed.

She whines when Drew slips her finger out but then it presses back inside along with another finger, stretching Nell a bit more, and Drew leans down to kiss her hastily, sloppily.

Nell’s hips jump when Drew finds that exact spot again, and she clenches the sheets beneath her in her fists.

Drew takes the opportunity to slide further down the bed and uses her other hand to rub tight circles against Nell’s clit, and the dual attack has Nell shivering and swearing, tilting her hips so she can fuck down onto Drew’s fingers.

“Shit,” Nell leans on her elbows and lets her head hang back, “Oh fuck, Drew, I’m—”

“Yeah?” Drew asks, her fingers starting to pump away inside of Nell with a speed Nell can’t begin to process, all she knows is that it feels fucking fantastic and she might explode.

Nell whines and gasps.

“You gonna come for me?”

Nell can’t even think straight as Drew’s fingers work harder and pleasure takes over.

Pressure builds and builds and when Drew flicks her thumb at Nell’s clit, she squeaks, “Wait—” before pleasure erupts and she’s screaming without any noise, her legs twitching as she comes on Drew’s fingers.

Drew keeps touching her, keeps her fingers inside and rubs her wetness against her lips with her other hand, keeps Nell shivering through her orgasm until she takes in a big gasping breath.

Nell lets herself fall against the mattress and throws her arm over her eyes as the aftershocks run through her, her stomach shivering and Drew’s hand rubbing over her thigh.

A few minutes later, when the muscles in her legs relax and she feels like she can breathe again, she moves her arm to face Drew.

“Hi,” Drew says with a pleased little smile on her face. “You okay?”

Nell bites her lip and nods.

“Mind if I clean you up?”

Nell doesn’t really think about it when she nods, but at the first swipe of Drew’s tongue against her folds, she startles.

“Wait, I—,” Nell says, and Drew immediately pulls back up. “Can I… I want to get you off too.”

Drew kisses Nell’s inner thigh, which turns Nell’s insides into molten goo. “You don’t have to.”

“I want to. Can you show me how?”

“You’re sure?

Nell nods, and when Drew reads the determination in her eyes, she nods and sits back up.

Before doing anything else, Drew reaches out and catches Nell’s jaw, then kisses her sweetly, then again, deeper, until Nell is groaning into Drew’s mouth, tentative fingers playing with one of Drew’s nipples. When she hears the noises it pulls from Drew, she starts teasing the other one too, until they’re peaked and sensitive, and Nell sort of wants to put her mouth on them.

Drew pushes at her shoulders until she’s flat on the bed again, and breathing heavily, she says, “That’s enough.”

Nell puts her arms down beside her and nods, unable to deny Drew anything.

“I’m going to sit on your face,” Drew says.

“Fuck.”

“And I’m going to eat you out.”

Nell nods, biting her lip.

“I’ll show you what to do, and you can try and copy it, alright?”

“Yes,” Nell breathes out. 

Once Drew has rearranged her body so her knees are next to Nell’s shoulders, she smooths her hands over Nell’s skin, tweaks Nell’s nipples and lands a kiss right next to her belly button.

“You can grab hold of my thighs,” Drew says, waiting for Nell to comply. “If anything’s wrong, or you want to pause or stop, you just give me a pinch, alright?”

Nell squeezes Drew’s thighs and enjoys the thickness of them, the way she can hold onto them for dear life once Drew leans down and gives another lick, urging her to lift her thighs up too.

Once Nell feels like she’s ready, and she can’t wait any longer, she tugs on Drew’s legs to move closer, and she can finally reach out to please her.

She can feel the jolt move through Drew’s legs and uses it to power her desire further, pulling Drew even closer and licking again, getting to know her body the closest way she can, and she starts experimenting.

Drew groans against the skin of her inner thigh when she touches her here, moans when she licks there, and she pulls off completely when Nell suckles gently on Drew’s clit, and bites Nell’s inner thigh.

As sweet revenge, Drew reaches her arm around Nell’s thigh and pushes two fingers inside her pussy, choosing to lick and suck on Nell’s clit until she’s thrashing on the bed, unable to even touch Drew with the way stars are exploding behind her eyes while Drew pumps inside, finding that exact spot that’s magic.

She’s panting, wants to extend her tongue and do something for Drew but she can’t even breathe right while Drew fingerfucks her until all she can do is scream through her second orgasm.

Nell’s fingers are leaving indentations on Drew’s thighs while Drew continues lapping and sucking, cleaning up Nell’s mess. 

“Fuck,” Nell swears with half a voice after Drew bites her thigh again. “That’s so unfair.”

“Hmm?” Drew says, licking her lips and winking at Nell. “What’s unfair?”

“I was gonna get you off,” Nell whines. “You went too fast.”

Drew kisses Nell’s stomach, low enough for Nell to shiver. “We can’t all be trigger happy little princesses.”

Nell pouts. “Mean. I  _ never  _ come like this.”

Drew grins and Nell can’t help but smile coyly and blush.

“I want you to come too... I just don’t think I can fucking move.”

Drew hums and slides her hands over Nell’s waist. “I don’t really need you to move…”

“Oh?”

“I could just ride your face.”

_ Fuck. _

“Do that,” Nell says, tugging at Drew’s thighs already. “Get yourself off on me, use me, come on.”

Drew tweaks Nell’s nipple. “Impatient baby.”

“I want you to come on my face.”

Drew chokes on a breath and chuckles, “You’re a brat.”

Nell hums happily when Drew shifts above her, and she sticks out her tongue so Drew can seek her own pleasure.

It takes a little while for them to find a rhythm that works, once Nell realizes she should just stop moving in general and Drew slides her wet lips over Nell’s tongue, her lips, her chin, grinding her hips back and forth. Nell discovers groaning and moaning makes Drew lose her rhythm in the best way, until Drew pulls off just so she can land her hands on Nell’s breasts, squeezing lightly, rubbing her thumbs over the areolas until her nipples stand perky and proud, ready for Drew’s nimble fingers to play with them some more only for Drew to leave her wanting and sit back, leaning on her arms pressed into the mattress closely to Nell’s skin.

Drew’s moans fill the room as she starts moving her hips again, faster this time, chasing her release until finally she gasps, twitches on Nell’s face in fast little jerks and Nell eagerly licks her come away.

Drew turns and lets herself drop onto the mattress, and Nell curls her body towards her, reaching out immediately and getting kisses in return. Drew has no problem licking into Nell’s mouth, using little kitten licks on her face to clean her up and feeding it back to her through deep, hungry kisses. Both her hands cup Nell’s face to keep her close but Nell has no intention of ever moving out of her grasp.

She hugs Drew to her chest, wraps her arms around her waist and sighs as she lets her whole body relax into Drew’s safe space.

The hungry clashing from before turns into lazy kisses, where Nell closes her eyes and only realizes she’s done it several minutes later when Drew’s featherlight fingers touch her eyelids.

Very slowly, Nell opens her eyes to face her. She bites her lip to try and stop the massive grin from appearing, but it’s a lost cause. She feels like she could conquer the world, and at the same time like she can’t move a single muscle.

“Hi,” Drew says, a twinkle in her eye that Nell’s entranced by. She reaches out to steal another kiss. “Greedy.”

Nell shrugs and laughs. “It’s payment for how you ruined me.”

Drew quirks a magnificently sexy brow. “Ruined?”

“Hmm,” Nell says, nodding with a teasing smile. 

With a burst of energy Nell is shocked by, Drew turns them both so she’s sitting on Nell’s thighs.

“Ruined?” She asks again, and when Nell doesn’t reply, she dips down to lick across Nell’s right nipple, peaking it once more, and making her jolt.

“Drew,” Nell starts and loses her breath when Drew takes her nipple into her mouth, nipping gently and sucking, moaning while Nell tries to buck underneath her. “No more—” She gasps, but keeps her hands to her sides, so it doesn’t surprise her when Drew lifts off, takes one look at the unconvincing refusal on her face and asks, “One more? You can do one more, baby.”

“Fuck,” Nell swears, the breath punched out of her. “You’re gonna kill me.”

“Hmm,” Drew now says, and actually waits for Nell to say it. It’s infuriatingly hot.

“Shut up,” Nell laughs and bites her lip. “One more.”

* * *

Nell doesn’t end up spending the night, with the next day being Christmas and them both having made plans to visit people. They rest on the bed a bit longer, then shower together, and after a whole lot more making out until the water goes cold, they get dressed —Nell borrowing some comfy clothes— and Drew drives her home.

The streets are pretty empty this late in the night, and only a light coat of snow surrounds them. When Drew parks in front of Nell’s building, Nell hesitates.

“Thanks,” she says. “For uh… Driving me.”

Drew just looks at her.

“And for the sex too, I mean,” Nell laughs nervously. “Stop me anytime.”

Drew smirks and pulls Nell closer by the front of her hoodie. “Shut up,” she says and kisses her.

It’s hard to pull away again, but eventually Drew makes the decision for them and pushes her back into her seat.

“I’ll see you on Monday?” Nell asks.

Drew nods. “See you then. Merry Christmas, Nell.”

Nell hides her smile in her collar. “Merry Christmas.”

* * *

The next day, Nell celebrates Christmas with her found family. Every year there’s a gathering at Dan and Matt’s place, where a manageable group of friends comes together —each bringing some food or drinks— hang out, play board games, watch bad Christmas movies while heckling them, consume way too much sugar and all sleep in the living room.

The day after that, however, when Nell is alone in her apartment and has time to think about everything that’s happened, she freaks out.

It starts when she sees the hoodie and sweats Drew gave her, lying on the chair next to her bed from when she changed the day before.

She stares at it. Minutes pass. She gets up, smells Drew’s perfume on them —which shouldn’t happen, Nell’s the one who wore them, but they smell distinctly of Drew— and drops them in her laundry basket, then turns around. Turns around again. She might as well do laundry now.

And it’s fine, when it’s in the washer, and she doesn’t have to see it. She eats breakfast, watches some videos and remembers nothing about them once they end. She gets restless.

She goes out for a run, and when she gets back, the beeping of her washing machine instantly washes away the calmness that had started to settle in.

She hangs the clothes out on a rail, then shoves that rail into the kitchen and closes the door.

She takes a nap.

When she wakes, the sun is starting to set, and she checks her phone to find nothing on it. No calls, no messages. Not that she expected anything. Not really.

And it’s fine. 

The day after passes in much the same way, except this time she showers.

She folds the clothes, ignores the clench in her gut when she touches Drew’s items and decides to shove them into the back of her closet. She doesn’t know why. It feels better when they’re out of sight.

She shuts the door of her closet and takes a deep breath in, stretching her entire body out, and finally relaxes as she exhales.

She calls Kevin, asks him how Christmas was at the Wymacks and lets him do most of the talking. It’s normal, almost.

“How was your night, after the party?” he asks.

“Yeah,” Nell says.

“What does that mean?”

“Nothing, Kevin.”

After a heavy silence, “Alright.”

* * *

On Monday Nell puts a thick woolen sweater on that’s a little too big on her, and she feels comfortable like she could drown in it. The office doesn’t have an official dress code, and Nell feels like hiding. It snowed all through the night, so Nell won’t even chance to ride her bike, opting for a ride on the bus instead.

Once she’s at the office, she can see Drew at her desk out of the corner of her eye, but she keeps walking ahead towards her locker, and then towards her own desk.

She pulls the collar of her sweater up and starts working. And she doesn’t stop.

Kevin comes by a few times, and after noticing she hasn’t moved after the first time, he brings a glass of water for her every following time.

When it’s time for lunch, she tells him to go on because she’s swamped, and then refuses to look up when she knows Drew and Kevin are walking past her to go to the elevator.

The thing is, she knows she’s acting stupid. She’s aware of how awkward she’s making everything, but that doesn’t mean she knows how to stop doing it.

After this workday from hell finally ends, Nell moves through the company hallway to see Drew waiting outside, a cigarette between her fingerless gloves.

She hasn’t seen Nell yet, and for some reason, Nell can’t get herself to go face her. If she’s there to talk to Nell, which seems likely, Nell would prefer to avoid that conversation. She doesn’t need to be told in person that it was a one-time thing, that it was all a mistake or that it wasn’t very good, or that they can go back to being ‘Kevin’s other friend’ now. It’s easier, better to ignore her than hope it’ll end up being a good talk.

She turns around and walks out of the side entrance. It would be okay, if she hadn’t forgotten she’s not on her bike today, and the bus stop is on the other side of the building.

She sighs, feels anxious jitters in her arms, and pulls the neck of her sweater up again. She starts walking.

She can see the exact moment Drew recognizes her, and the pit in her stomach builds and builds but she can’t get herself to stop. 

Drew doesn’t look away. Her left foot is leaning against the wall and she brings her cigarette to her mouth, exhales deeply and she does not take her eyes off Nell. And Nell can’t stand being  _ seen  _ like that, so she turns her eyes to the snowy sidewalk and continues on. 

She panics once she’s on the bus. She can’t undo what she just did. The entire day was stupid, cowardly behavior, and now she can’t undo any of it.

* * *

It shouldn’t hurt as much as it does, the next day, when Drew ignores her. 

It’s not even like she avoids Nell, she just simply doesn’t care whether she’s in the room or not. While Nell and Kevin are grabbing drinks in the breakroom, Drew walks in and starts talking to Kevin, like Nell isn’t even there. It’s only fair, Nell thinks, and so she leaves the room instead.

When Kevin walks up to her desk to grab her for lunch, she can see Drew’s waiting behind him, and Nell scrambles to find an excuse.

“I’ll go for a walk,” she says, and Kevin frowns. 

“You’re wearing high heeled boots.”

“Yes, Kevin.”

“It’s snowing.”

Nell sighs. “Kevin.”

“Fine,” he relents. “But I’m driving you home later. Not taking no for an answer.”

“Alright,” Nell says, and she can’t help but smile at her best friend who is far more thoughtful than she deserves. “Thanks.”

It’s clear that Kevin has known Nell for a lot longer because at the end of the day he walks up to her desk and watches as she packs up her stuff.

“I told you I’d go with you.”

“You’ve told me that before,” Kevin chastises her. “Forgive me for being careful.”

Nell doesn’t reply to that. 

The drive to Nell’s isn’t as stressful as Nell would have thought, but this is Kevin, she should have known. He’s always just trying his best to protect her, even when she feels like she doesn’t need it.

Kevin ends up coming up with her, they order take out, watch bad television.

Nell’s surprised Kevin manages to hold out for as long as he does before finally asking about what’s happened.

Except Kevin wouldn’t straight up just ask her that, knowing full well Nell would make up an excuse, or downplay it while she’s clearly still struggling.

Instead what he asks is, “You’re still coming on Thursday, right?”

“Oh,” Nell says. “Right. Thursday.”

New year’s eve. A party at Kevin’s house, for all of his closest friends.

Nell grimaces. “Would you hate me if I didn’t come?”

“I wouldn’t,” Kevin says, and Nell knows better than to believe he’d stop there. “If you can give me an explanation.”

“Ah,” Nell winces. “You know I can’t do that.”

“Not yet?” Kevin asks.

“Not yet.”

Kevin starts folding his paper napkin, one of his twitches Nell knows he does when he’s uncomfortable. “Will you be okay, if she’s there?”

She can’t help but be overcome with compassion for Kevin now, stuck between two fires. He’s friends with both of them, and she wouldn’t ever want to make him choose.

She puts on her most convincing smile. “Of course, Kevin. I’ll be fine.”

Kevin nods, not entirely convinced, Nell knows, but enough to keep him from pushing.

“So,” Nell changes the subject. “Will I finally meet whoever you’ve been seeing on Thursday?”

Kevin’s instant blush tells her enough.

* * *

There was no reason to dress up this time, but that doesn’t mean Nell doesn’t feel a little underdressed anyway when she shows up at Kevin’s in an oversized sweater dress with the sleeves so long she can pull them over her knuckles.

Kevin’s apartment is quite roomy, and there’s a large group of people gathered in his living room, reminding Nell that some people have more than three friends, actually. Far too much work, as far as she’s concerned.

She greets the people she vaguely knows, says hello to the ones she doesn’t, and hopes no one strikes up a conversation with her. 

She has a minor aneurysm when she recognizes Jean, someone who had also been at school with her and Kevin.

He came back to the neighborhood a few months ago, he tells her, and has decided to settle here after months of traveling the world for work.

After catching up for a good long while, Jean gets whisked away by a handsome guy with blond curly hair, and Nell goes on a search for tonight’s host.

She finds him in the kitchen near all the drinks, which Nell would make a joke about if Drew wasn’t standing right next to him.

She freezes in the doorframe.

“Oh,” she says. “Hi.”

Drew doesn’t reply. Kevin looks like he’s swallowed a bug.

“Hey, uh…” He winces. “Drink?”

“I’ll get it,” Nell says and grabs a can of soda. She fiddles with the tab as the awkward silence really settles in around them.

Then, there’s a knock on the doorframe, and Jean and the blond guy from before lean their heads in.

“Is this where the cool people hang out?”

And then the weirdest thing happens. Kevin does this funny little snort, and his face pulls up in a scrunch and Nell just stares as the wheels in her head are turning.

“Kevin,” she says. “The fuck?”

She’s vehemently  _ not  _ looking at Drew, but she’s staring at Kevin too, waiting for answers.

“Ah,” Kevin says, and Jean and his friend come to stand next to him. “This is my boyfriend, Jean. And his boyfriend, Jeremy. Who is also my boyfriend. Uhm.”

Nell blinks at them. Jean puts his arm around Kevin’s waist, and Jeremy kisses Kevin on the cheek.

“You’re so cute.” Jeremy nuzzles into Kevin’s cheek and then seems to remember they’re not alone, reaching his hand out to shake Nell’s, then Drew’s. “So nice to meet you both. Do you mind terribly if we steal him away for a minute?”

_ Yes _ . Nell would like to say yes. That or get swallowed up by the floor, but neither of those things happens and the three of them leave, and then she’s stuck in the kitchen with Drew.

Nell always thought that in a fight or flight scenario, she would flee, almost every time. Occasionally she would consider fighting if it came down to it. Never once did she think she’d be the type to freeze.

Yet here she is, frozen in place. She accidentally pulls the tab off her soda can without opening it and then decides to set the can down and just start fiddling with the tab instead, keeping her fingers busy, looking at the floor.

And Drew, well, Drew is torturing her by not moving either. It’s torture the way she just stands there and is waiting her out, in her black hoodie and dark jean overalls —looking very unnecessarily cute, fucking hell— sipping from a glass of red wine casually.

“So,” escapes out of Nell’s mouth. “I uh…”

“Forget about it,” Drew says, and the sound of her voice after this week of self-imposed maddening silence breaks something in Nell.

She tries to speak but only this choked-off noise comes out, and then there’s a stinging behind her eyes and she really,  _ really  _ would love not to burst into tears right here, but she’s starting to panic and she doesn’t know what to do. Why can’t she just  _ fucking move _ ?

Someone snaps their fingers in front of Nell’s face, and when she looks up and tries to focus she can see Drew.

“Hey, Nell, it’s me, okay? Let me take you somewhere else, can I touch you?”

“F-fuck,” Nell says shakily, but nods and lets herself be guided towards another room where Drew makes her sit on the floor and sits down in front of her.

Nell leans back hard against the wall behind her, pulls up her knees and tucks them in tightly, hiding her face behind them.

When she sees the worried look on Drew’s face, she loses it completely.

The tears break loose, and she can’t seem to shut up but all she’s saying is “I’m sorry, I’m really sorry,” keeps repeating it so Drew will know just how  _ hard  _ she means it.

She’s hyperventilating, keeps choking on her own breaths and spit, and she enjoys the way her eyes are all blurred out because it means she can’t look at Drew’s face anymore.

She startles when she feels the hand on her shoulder, but then Drew’s voice is right beside her and it’s funny how immediately calming it works.

“Don’t be stupid,” Drew says and separates Nell’s hands from where she’d been picking at her own fingernails, then reaches out to wipe away a stray tear on Nell’s cheek. They sit there quietly until Nell’s breathing slows back to a normal pace.

“I’m sorry,” Nell repeats, trying not to focus on the fact that Drew is still holding her hand.

“For what?”

Nell can’t help but scoff wetly. “That you have to take care of this mess, for one thing.”

Drew hums. “I came here of my own volition. What else?”

It would sound accusatory if it weren’t for Drew putting her arm around Nell’s waist, pulling her closer until Nell’s heavy head falls on Drew’s shoulder.

She chokes on another sob. “I was so horrible to you all week.”

“Silly girl,” Drew says, landing her chin on top of Nell’s hair. “I think you and I have different definitions of the word ‘horrible’.”

“Don’t downplay it,” Nell sniffs. “It wasn’t very nice of me.”

“Alright,” Drew agrees. “It wasn’t nice. You wanna tell me why?”

Through her muddled thought process, Nell wonders if Drew has on that one perfume. She would love to smell it now, if it weren’t for her runny nose, because it’s extremely comforting. She starts fiddling with Drew’s fingers.

It’s better, easier like this when she doesn’t have to look Drew in the eyes. 

“I got scared.”

“Of what?”

Nell shrugs a little. “Of everything. Of how good it was. Of it being a fluke. Of it being better in my head than in real life. Of you thinking it was bad, or a fluke, or that it was a one-time thing. Which, you know, I would be fine with. Eventually, I would be fine with that. I just didn’t want to be.”

Drew’s hand on her waist just starts petting gently, making Nell feel so warm. “So, what happened?”

“Sometimes,” Nell says, speaking so low she’s almost whispering. “When I really really want something… I just. Run away instead.”

She feels the anxiety coursing through her body as she lays herself bare.

“Sometimes I feel it’s better to escape the potential rejection than to hope for acceptance. I don’t really like hope. It’s such an easy thing to get crushed.”

“You can’t survive without hope,” Drew says. “There has to be something you can run to, not just from.”

Nell sniffs. “I don’t want to run anymore.”

“Nobody’s asking you to, Nell.” Drew links fingers with Nell and gives them a gentle squeeze.

When she feels like she’s ready, Nell raises her head and looks at Drew, who calmly gazes back at her, without any judgment in her eyes.

“I’m really sorry.”

The corner of Drew’s mouth lifts up. “Yeah? What for this time?”

Nell chortles. “I got snot all over your hoodie.”

Drew smirks and tugs her even closer. “You’re just lucky I’m wearing my snot hoodie then.”

“Gross,” Nell laughs. 

The muted bass from the music in the other room travels through the walls, and Nell finally takes a look around to notice they must be sitting in Kevin’s bedroom. There are three pillows on the bed, which makes Nell smile.

“So, what uh—” Nell starts to ask, not really sure how she would go about it before the loud ring of Drew’s phone interrupts her.

“Sorry,” Drew says, frowning at her phone. “I need to take this. Hello?”

Nell tries her best not to eavesdrop, but that’s kind of hard when there’s just two of them in an enclosed room. Drew immediately stands up and tenses.

“Yep. No, I’m like a twenty-minute drive away. My brother has the back-up key but he lives even farther. No, it’s okay, I’ll drive back. Thanks for letting me know. Stay inside, just in case.”

Nell has never heard Drew panicked, but she’s definitely on edge.

“What’s wrong?” she asks, standing up from her spot on the floor.

“Something’s up at my apartment. Neighbor said she heard a big crash through the walls, but she’s in her seventies, I don’t want her investigating that shit.”

“Right,” Nell says. “Uh…”

“I need to go.”

“Yeah, of course, uh… Should I— I don’t know, come with you?”

Drew hesitates for a brief second. “No, it’ll be okay. Probably something stupid. You’ve had a long night, huh. Try and decompress with Kevin and his boyfriends or something. I’ll call you later.”

“Will you?” Nell blurts out before thinking about it. “Sorry, that’s not fair.”

Drew tugs Nell closer by the arms and lands a kiss on her hair near her temple. “I’ll call you.”

“Okay,” Nell says, and then Drew leaves.

She uses Kevin’s mirror to wipe away most of the evidence of tonight's events from her face before checking her phone. It’s only ten P.M. Midnight’s ages away, and now Drew isn’t even here anymore.

She joins everyone in the living room, and quickly gets taken under Jeremy’s wing, who’s an empath and a lightweight. She starts feeling like a bummer, tired and worn out as she is, and while Kevin protests, Nell decides to go home after all.

It’s early enough for the buses not to be too crowded, and Kevin’s isn’t too far from Nell’s place, so it’s only around eleven when she arrives, takes off her dress and tights, changes into Drew’s hoodie and sweats because she’s wallowing.

Nell’s tv is on, music playing softly in the background and she decides right there and then that instead of worrying about her feelings being reciprocated or wanted, she’ll just admit to them, and whatever happens, happens.

She’s a big girl, and so is Drew, and while it may be awkward, after everything that’s happened tonight, Nell is sure they can work it out.

She’s not quite brave enough to say it out loud, though, so she sends her a message instead.

_ My dear esteemed coworker whose name I can’t forget, _

_ I sincerely hope you haven’t been bludgeoned to death by a burglar in your home. This would be an awkward message for the police to find. _

_ Excuse the dramatics, but I’m a coward at heart. It’s taken me some time to realize this thing between us, at least for me, started way before last week. I don’t have the most or even best experience, as you know, and when something is as easy and comfortable as this, sometimes it’s hard to realize something has changed, for the better. Hard to name that thing.  _

_ I think I can name it now.  _

_ No matter how you feel about me, about this, I wanted to say thank you. It’s been amazing.  _

_ And I’m sorry. Sorry for being unfair to you, sorry for stealing your clothes, sorry for wiping snot all over your hoodie while you took care of me when I really didn’t deserve it. I’m not sorry for the feelings. They are unapologetically here.  _

_ Happy New Year, Drew. I wish you all the best. _

_ Yours regardless, _

_ Nell _

She doesn’t hesitate before hitting send, but after it’s gone, she shuts her phone off and throws it on her bed, then grabs a pint of ice cream and curls up on her sofa.

Tonight is a night for comfort food and low-quality tv, and that’s enough. It’ll have to be enough.

* * *

Except, at five minutes to midnight, there is frantic knocking on her door.

Nell had started to doze off a little, the excitement and anxiety of the last week catching up with her, so she startles at the unexpected sound.

Even less expected is when she opens the door and Drew is standing there, out of breath and looking gorgeous, and Nell still has a spoon in her mouth.

She takes it out and blinks. Blinks again. Drops the spoon on the floor, the impact so terribly loud in the otherwise silent apartment. “Drew?”

“Yeah,” Drew breathes sharply.

“I uh—” Nell mutters dumbly. “What happened at your place?”

“My fucking cat jumped off my bookshelf and took all my books with it. Don’t ask me how they managed that. They’re a fucking punk.”

Nell fails at hiding a smile and nods. “And, uh… How come you’re here?”

“I told you I’d call,” Drew says, stepping into Nell’s apartment and closing the door behind her. “And you didn’t pick up.”

“Ah,” Nell winces. “I—”

“Shut up,” Drew grins. “Can I kiss you?”

It’s like all the air in Nell’s body is punched out with her pure need when she says, “Fuck, yes—” and Drew pulls her close, cups Nell’s face in her hands, allows Nell’s on her hips, and then she kisses her and all Nell can do is think, ‘ _ amazing, amazing, amazing _ ’.

They don’t move when the fireworks start outside, Nell doesn’t even open her eyes when there’s shouting in the street and light shows on her tv screen, because what does she care about any of that when Drew is right here.

One of her hands drops to shove underneath her hoodie, and the heat of her skin on Nell’s makes her shake and moan, even more so when Drew walks her backward until she hits the wall and she feels caged in and safe. 

Her apartment lights up in technicolor from the fireworks outside, reflecting in Drew’s eyes as they look at each other, panting heavily, taking each other in.

Nell looks up through her lashes, aware the scant height difference is only because of Drew’s fucking boots, and she smiles, and she’s happy, and she says, “Kiss me.”

And Drew does.

The hot press of her lips on Nell’s light her up inside, her fingers squeezing her waist so distracting and calming at the same time while Drew nibbles gently on her bottom lip, and Nell whines.

She lets Drew lick inside so she can suck on her tongue, and while she’s horny and worked up, she’s also so incredibly tired she just lets herself sink into Drew’s hold.

Drew moves to nip gently at Nell’s jaw, her chin, the side of her neck which makes her jolt and giggle.

She halfheartedly pushes Drew off and mumbles, “Ticklish.”

Drew smirks and it looks so good and right on her, all Nell can do is smile.

“Happy New Year,” Nell says after seeing the blinking clock on her microwave telling her they’ve been standing there for ages.

Drew hums and leans back in to steal a harsh kiss. “Your fucking message.”

“What about it,” Nell says, too sleepy to be anxious over it. Her fingers play with the strap on Drew’s overalls. Those really should come off.

Drew kisses her. And kisses her and kisses her until Nell can’t remember what they were talking about, dropping her arms over Drew’s shoulders and letting Drew hug their bodies close.

“You’re infuriating,” Drew says, which makes Nell smile against her cheek.

“I’m sleepy,” she replies. “And you’re wearing so many clothes.”

“I’m wearing a normal amount of clothes.”

Nell lifts her head and feels brave. “Are you staying over?”

“Yeah,” Drew answers without pause. “If that’s okay with you?”

“I am so incredibly fine with that.”

“Good,” Drew says, stepping away from the wall where they made their little shelter. “Let’s get you to bed.”

Filled with regret, Nell also moves from her spot, but it’s to take Drew over to her wardrobe to find her something to sleep in, so it’s not too bad.

Some old throwaway line about not getting ants makes Nell leave Drew to it while she tidies up her living room, taking the melted ice cream over to her sink, blowing out her Christmas themed candle, and turning off the tv that’s just showing drunk people singing along to nineties music now.

When she opens the door to her bedroom, it’s to the sight of Drew in one of Nell’s tank tops, tight enough on her that she can see her nipples through the fabric and short enough that there’s a strip of exposed skin between that and the top of Drew’s cotton panties, sitting and leaning back all relaxed on the side of Nell’s bed. It really doesn’t leave anything up to imagination, and Nell could stare at her tattoos forever.

Nell clears her throat a few times because it doesn’t seem to stick. “I— uh. Hi. Are you uh… gonna be warm enough? Not that I’m complaining. At all.”

Drew shrugs. “We’re gonna cuddle. Get comfy.”

“Right.” Nell looks down at her, no, Drew’s hoodie and sweats. She turns to the wardrobe, picks out an oversized shirt, and while still facing away, she drops the pants and sweater until she stands there half-naked, then quickly pulls the shirt over her head before turning around.

She self consciously crosses her arms in front of her stomach, even though it’s already covered, and it’s not like Drew hasn’t seen all of her already.

“Nell,” Drew says, voice soft but demanding. “Come to bed.”

She can’t deny her. She won’t even try.

Once they’re settled in and facing each other, their bodies like two mirrored commas, Nell’s brain catches up with tonight’s proceedings.

“How did you even get into the building?”

“Uh,” Drew says, briefly pausing her fingers which were gently trailing over Nell’s shoulder. “I don’t think I want to share that.”

Nell grins gleefully. “Now you have to tell me. I need to know.”

Drew sighs and rolls her eyes. “I may or may not have rang every single doorbell until someone let me in.”

Nell guffaws.

“And then I may have checked the mailboxes to see which apartment number was yours.”

“Oh my god.”

“And then I may have ran up the stairs because I don’t trust elevators.”

Nell can’t stop smiling. “You’re kidding.”

“It’s a height thing. And a self-preservation thing.”

“There are elevators at work.”

“Yes, I’ve seen them.

“Holy shit.”

Drew hums.

“I live on the fourth floor.”

“Yes, that was… fun to find out.”

Nell shuffles closer and wraps Drew’s arm around her waist.

“You’re a romantic, huh?”

“You shut your mouth.”

“Make—”

Drew doesn’t even let her finish before dragging her closer and kissing her silent.

It’s a little while later, and their lips are swollen, but while Nell’s body is exhausted, her brain can’t seem to calm down yet. 

“Is your cat gonna be okay?”

“Yeah,” Drew nudges their noses together. “They’re an asshole, they don’t give a fuck about some mild property destruction.”

“What’s their name?”

Drew pulls a weird scrunched up face, and it’s offensively cute. “Ask me later.”

“Alright,” Nell agrees easily and nudges her leg between Drew’s.

“You gonna sleep?”

“Hmm,” Nell says. “Maybe. What’s in it for me?”

“That depends,” Drew says, dragging her hand down Nell’s body until it lands on the soft curve of her ass. 

Nell chokes on her breath. 

“Have you touched yourself since we fucked?”

God,  _ fucked _ . The simple word shouldn’t be enough to work Nell up like this, but it is.

She shakes her head and bites her lip.

“I think I should show you what else you like.” Drew kisses her squarely on the lips. “Tomorrow.”

Nell whines and buries her face in Drew’s shoulder. “You’re a fucking tease.”

“Yes,” Drew says. “And you’re tired. And I'm not doing all the work again, baby.”

Nell blushes and would start to feel bad if it weren’t for Drew’s follow-up wink.

“Fine,” she says. “Goodnight kiss?”

“Come and get it,” Drew says and smirks when Nell bowls her over and lies on top of her, and takes, and takes.

* * *

Somehow, Drew’s hand is still on Nell’s ass when she wakes up, and it’s a struggle to escape her hold, just like it’s a struggle to convince herself she really should get up.

Her kitchen is woefully under-equipped to serve anybody breakfast, so she spends twenty minutes just checking what the hell is in her cupboards she could use.

She doesn't drink coffee, and therefore doesn’t own any coffee… Or a coffee maker. Or anything caffeinated, but there’s a stray bag of instant hot chocolate, so she heats up some milk instead of the water the packet claims it needs. There’s a bakery nearby but Nell doesn’t want to leave the apartment, doesn’t want to get dressed, doesn’t even want to see anyone that isn’t Drew today, so she grabs a cereal box and pitter-patters back to bed.

Her stomach does this weird fluttering thing when she sees Drew lying there, eyes half-opened and body half covered, and she rushes to set the mug down on the bedside table before she does something embarrassing like drop it.

“Breakfast in bed,” she says, voice muted as she shakes the cereal box with a little grin and yelps when Drew drags her back onto the bed.

“What a treat,” she says and kisses Nell’s neck.

Nell pouts and points at her mouth. “What about here?”

Drew shakes her head. “Are you gonna let me out to brush my teeth?”

Nell drops her weight on Drew, kisses her chest and groans. “Fucking fine.”

After a quick bathroom break where Nell miraculously finds an unused toothbrush and they both brush their teeth while staring intensely at each other in the mirror, the tension has risen and Nell bounces on the bed awkwardly.

“Lie back,” Drew tells her, and it’s in that tone that makes Nell want to just submit and do whatever she’s asked. “You want to keep the shirt on?”

Nell nods, grateful for the question and the easy acceptance, and only shakes a little when Drew pulls the tiny top over her head, gets naked and then crawls on top of the bed to pull Nell’s panties down her legs.

“You’re gorgeous,” Nell breathes, reaching out to touch Drew’s arms, following along the dark lines of her tattoos. 

Drew drops her weight until the peaks of her nipples press against Nell’s through her shirt, and tilts Nell’s face so she can kiss her and lick inside, suckle on her tongue and tease her, ruin her for anyone else.

“Do you trust me?”

Nell nods and tucks a strand of Drew’s hair behind her ear. “Yeah.”

“I’ll make you feel good, baby.”

“Fuck.”

Drew reaches her hand down and starts by simply rubbing at Nell’s folds, which is enough to make Nell gasp. She slips her fingers further towards the middle where Nell is getting wetter, and she spreads it around, carefully avoiding Nell’s clit. 

Nell moans and tugs Drew’s face closer, nips and bites at her lower lip to distract herself from how good she’s already feeling.

Her thumb caresses Nell’s sensitive clit and Nell groans and clenches her hands on Drew’s arms. “What about— fuck, what about you.”

Drew looks down at her, pupils blown wide, says, “You don’t even know how sexy you are, do you?” and takes Nell’s hand down to touch Drew where she already feels so hot and slick.

“I wanna make you feel good,” Nell whines, breathes against Drew’s lips. “Tell me how.”

“That’s what I hoped you’d say,” Drew smirks. “I think you should ride me.”

_ Fuck _ . “What?”

Nell’s brain is short-circuiting, and it really doesn’t help when Drew takes her fingers back to suck them into her mouth. 

“I’m going to lay down, and you’re going to straddle me and figure out how to please yourself. Use me. Trust me, I’ll enjoy every second of it.”

Nell’s heart is beating overtime. “Wh— But what—”

Drew kisses her, drags her fingers through Nell’s hair to grab tightly, and it works so reassuringly it sort of blindsides Nell how relaxed she instantly feels. “You can’t do it wrong, okay? I can guide you a little, but it’s all about you learning your own body. You deserve more orgasms, babe.”

Somehow, out of everything, that’s what makes Nell blush.

“Okay,” Nell says timidly. “But I want you to come too.”

“I will,” Drew says confidently and grins. “Now come on.”

She settles down on the mattress, and all stretched out and unworried, she’s the hottest person alive. Her confidence is contagious, so Nell shakes off her nerves and slots in between Drew’s legs. 

It takes a little while to figure out where all her limbs go, her folded leg under Drew’s right thigh, the other slung over her stomach so she can still put pressure and move her body herself. None of that breaks the tension, especially when she finally puts some weight down and her pussy touches Drew’s.

“Fuck,” Nell says, overwhelmed. “I don’t know what I’m doing—”

Drew rubs a calming hand over the thigh she can reach. “Here, hold on to my thigh,” she says, lifting it up higher. 

Nell immediately does, and is grateful for it, and immensely turned on because Drew has the best, squishiest, strongest thighs in the world and she could write songs about them.

Drew leans up on her elbows, directs Nell closer for a harsh, open-mouthed kiss and it calms her nerves.

“Just start moving, sweetheart.”

Nell’s entire face is red, she’s sure of it. When she does finally shift forward, she almost lifts off again just from how weird and incredibly sensitive it feels.

“Keep going,” Drew says, lifts her hips minutely so they’re touching again, and it feels so wet, so hot and good that Nell gives in. Her breath hitches every few seconds as their clits connect, as they slide slickly on top of each other, looking for friction and pleasure. 

Nell’s grip on Drew’s thigh tightens, her loose and sweaty curls fall over her shoulder as she rides Drew and finds out exactly what she likes.

Her hips grind forwards and back, aiming to get more moans out of Drew but apparently, she really is as sensitive as Drew keeps calling her. She feels pleasure building, but she doesn’t want it yet, she’s too selfish, this isn’t about her— She sits up until they’re no longer touching, and her clit throbs from the interruption so she whines, but she couldn’t— not yet.

“What’s wrong?” Drew says, sitting up and cupping Nell’s jaw in her hand.

“Nothing, I—” Her breath hitches again. “It was too soon. I needed to stop.”

“Why?” Drew’s thumb tilts her chin down until her mouth falls open.

“You— For you…”

“Did I tell you to stop?” Drew’s eyes pierce right through her, and even that makes her want to clench her thighs tightly together. She can’t hide in this position, wide open in every way.

Nell shakes her head. 

“No, baby, I didn’t. Maybe it’s best if we leave the decision making up to me.”

Nell swallows and doesn’t know what to do with herself. But Drew knows. Drew will tell her.

“On your back,” she says, and they switch places.

She lifts Nell’s leg to lean it against her shoulder, and when Drew’s in charge and decides to get started Nell scrambles for something to hold onto.

She has to settle for the sheets once Drew presses them together, stretching her upper body with tightened fists above her. The filthy slick noise is loud in the room as they slide together, but when Drew starts grinding and moving her hips, it’s not as gentle. It’s not slow, not soft, she doesn’t let Nell catch her breath as she fucks her, leaving bite marks on her leg.

Nell’s high-pitched whines and moans reverberate around the room, and she tries to push Drew off but there’s no strength left in her arms, all her focus is on her hot throbbing pussy that’s ready to explode.

“Fuck— I can’t— Drew,” she moans, “I’m gonna—”

“Yeah, sweetheart? Do you like it when I fuck you? You’d look so pretty on my strap. I can only imagine how good it would feel to bend you over the couch and just fuck you right then and there. Would you like that?”

Nell nods quickly, feeling hot tears run down her face. “Yeah, I— I need that. I want you to fuck— Shit, to fuck me. Drew, oh my god.”

“Yeah?” Drew’s voice has gone raspy with desire, and Nell can feel it in her gut. “Are you going to come for me, baby?”

Nell shudders out a breath as Drew keeps moving her hips, Nell’s moving in unison without even realizing it, seeking out her own pleasure. “Hmm,” she moans, bites down on her lower lip to keep the squeak inside. “Almost.”

“You need a little extra?” Drew asks, sitting back and making Nell whine until she yanks on Nell’s legs and lifts her hips up over hers. She rubs her thumb around Nell’s ruined, wet lips, then slips two fingers in just like that. They’re in to the knuckle, which has Drew’s thumb in the perfect position to tease and flick at her swollen clit, and Nell is going to pass out.

“Fuck, I can’t—”

“You can,” Drew says. “You will.”

She can’t even say words anymore, just long high-pitched whining as Drew ruins her, and it all comes to a blinding finish when Drew leans down and mouths at her, licks around her fingers and takes her clit in her mouth, gives gentle little sucks while she tongues it.

Nell  _ screams _ , screams until she can’t hear herself anymore, her vision whites out and her legs are shaking.

Next time she opens her eyes, it’s to Drew’s pleased and proud smile, her fingers still inside of her, teasing her gently, working her through it.

“Fuck,” she croaks. She’s flushed over her entire body, a sweaty mess.

“You feel good, baby?”

“I feel like I died,” Nell says. “Fuck, you gotta stop.”

She pushes Drew’s hand away only to tug her body closer instead. “Did you like that?”

“Hmm,” Drew says and rewards her with a kiss, sloppy and brain-melting.

“Did you come?”

Drew shushes her and moves her body around, and Nell only realizes what’s happening when she feels wet heat move on her thigh.

“Holy fuck,” Nell says, and Drew starts grinding against her skin. “What do I do?”

Drew looks at her half-lidded and bites down on her own lip. “Just lie there and look pretty, baby.”

Drew’s thighs are within reach, so Nell sees fit to grab hold of one and squeeze, and with the help of little lifts of her thigh to provide some friction, Drew comes with a groan, one hand on Nell’s concave stomach and the other tugging lightly at her own nipple.

Their gasps and heavy breathing are loud in the room, and Nell admires the slatted shadow of sunlight on Drew’s skin as she sits there, self-satisfied and gorgeous.

After a few minutes, she grows far too aware of how sweaty she is, how her shirt is sticking to her skin, how she hasn’t brushed her hair, and she’s been writhing on the bed, so it’s bound to be full of painful knots.

They relocate to the shower, where there’s a strict ban on funny business because that’s  _ dangerous _ , and Nell is feeling far too loose-limbed.

While Nell stays put to try and work out the bird’s nest from her hair, Drew leaves to find something to wear, and when Nell finally steps back into her bedroom, it’s to the sight of Drew replacing her sheets in a shirt where the arms were cut off, the armholes open so low you have an unobstructed view of  _ sideboob _ . In this case, with Drew leaning forward to take off the pillowcases, there’s really nothing left to the imagination.

“You’re so fucking hot.”

Never once has Nell worn that shirt without something underneath it, not even in the comfort of her own home. And here Drew is, just tits half out, and Nell wants to plant kisses all over them, not even in a sexual way.

She walks over to her wardrobe, still blushing from what she just blurted out, and starts getting dressed. It’s only when she wants to step into her sweats that she hears Drew’s voice behind her, “Wear shorts.”

“Huh?” She turns and asks.

Drew gives her a once over, then looks her in the eyes. “I like your legs. I want to see them.”

She freezes in place for a moment, in her crop top and panties and nothing else, and fights the urge to cover her stomach.

Drew walks until she’s in front of Nell and gently nudges her chin up with a fingertip. “You okay?”

Nell nods shakily. “Yeah, fine.”

“Don’t lie,” Drew says, pressing their lips together in comfort. “You know you can do what you want, right? If you want to wear fucking ski pants, you just do. I’m not the boss of you.”

“No, I know,” Nell says quietly, leaning into Drew but looking just to the left of her. “I like it when you tell me what to do.”

“Okay,” Drew says. “Then what else is wrong? I can hear you thinking.”

Nell chuckles and presses her forehead against Drew’s shoulder.

“You’re not supposed to be able to read me this well already.”

“Disagree. I’m glad I do.”

Nell sighs. “Can we sit down for this?”

They move to the couch after a small pitstop in the kitchen to make cocoa, and when they’re all huddled up and settled in, Nell decides to just...ask.

“Do you think I’m too high maintenance?”

Drew looks at her for a minute, takes another sip and sets down her mug.

“What makes you say that?”

“I feel like…” She starts frinicking with the tassels on her blanket. “I feel like you're doing so much to make me feel good, and I appreciate that, like a lot. But I feel like I’m not pulling my weight. I’m not doing the same for you. And I know that’s weird to say after only being together a few times, but I don’t want this to become a pattern, I guess.”

“Alright,” Drew says. “I’m going to be honest with you, just so we can make this as transparent as possible, okay?”

Nell nods and fights back the anxiety building.

“Sex isn’t always an exchange, like an orgasm for an orgasm. Sure, sometimes it is, orgasms are really good for you, and if two people can do that for each other, that’s great. Some people like getting off by themselves, some people only come with someone else. There are no set rules, baby.”

“But,” Nell starts, “It’s like I’m taking advantage of you. I didn’t know how to use my body, and you did so I just let you do all the work.”

“First of all,” Drew leans in and kisses Nell square on the lips. “You didn’t let me do anything, you didn’t force me into anything. I only do what I want to do, okay? Second of all, I really don’t think you understand how hot you are, and how much I like seeing you get off. Do you hear me? I enjoy it. I don’t have to come to enjoy something.”

“I’m— Okay… Can I… Can I ask something really stupid?”

Drew sends her this fond smile. “Yes.”

“What if I can’t do it by myself?”

“What, come?”

Nell nods. “What if, like, you have these magic fucking fingers, and a magic pussy, and only you can get me off, and I’ll just use you because you’re this magic fucking...fuck.”

“... That is a very stupid question, silly girl.”

Nell laughs into her collar and blushes. “Stop it, I’m serious! Well, kind of.”

“I am many things, but I don’t think I’m a Magic Fucking Fuck.”

“God, shut up. I regret everything.”

“Nell,” Drew says and makes her look her in the eyes. “There is nothing wrong with you. You just don’t know what you’re capable of. All this time you’ve been stuck in a locked room, and I just gave you a key.”

Drew tugs at her fingers so Nell stops fidgeting.

“I am not the only person in the world who can make you come.”

“You should be.”

She didn’t mean to say that. Not really. It was supposed to stay in her head. 

“What?” Drew asks, even though she definitely heard her.

“Uh.”

Drew grins.

“Shut up.”

“I didn’t say anything.”

Nell huffs, getting warm for no reason. “Shut up and drink your cocoa, Minyard.”

* * *

“Are you comfortable?” 

Nell shifts into place a little, feeling the comforting heat of Drew’s body behind her, her arms around her waist, thumb rubbing soothing circles on her stomach.

She’s nervous, but of course, Drew knows that, if not from the tension in the air, it’s from the shivers of her body.

“Relax, baby,” she says, kissing behind Nell’s ear. “We’re just going to explore a little together, right?”

Nell nods and tries to relax, blesses the gods for Drew’s thighs around her and uses them as an anchor.

“Are your nipples sensitive?”

It’s not a very hard question, since the proof is standing quite proudly on her chest.

“Yeah,” she whispers.

“Show me,” Drew says, waiting for Nell to touch herself.

When she does, when she lightly rubs across her hard left nipple, she moans and takes her hand off immediately, and is reprimanded by the tsk in her ear.

“No, sweetheart. I told you to show me.”

Nell squirms and rubs up against Drew’s chest, feels her breasts against her back.

“Shall I do it instead?”

Nell whines and pushes her chest up, and she really doesn’t feel like talking but the sound of Drew’s voice so close in her ear just  _ works  _ for her.

By the time Drew’s fingers are toying with Nells nipples, she’s closed her eyes so she jolts when it happens, when her thumbs rub around her areolas, when her hands cup her breasts and she tweaks her nipples, unrelenting. Nell is so,  _ so  _ wet and they have only just gotten started.

“You’re perfect, you know that? Such pretty little tits, so responsive to my every move. I could play with them forever, put my mouth on them and tease you with my teeth and my tongue.”

“Drew—”

“Another time,” Drew interrupts Nell’s begging. “I wanna show you what you can do to yourself.”

“Hnng.”

“Are you wet?”

“Yeah,” Nell moans.

“Show me. Touch yourself and show me your fingers.”

Fuck, Nell is like a woman possessed, the way she can’t deny Drew a single thing, the way she moves her hand down slowly, blush on her cheeks but unstopping. Even she’s surprised at just how wet she is, how hot it all feels, how she throbs.

She slides her fingers around for a bit, then shows them off for Drew. 

“You feel good, baby?”

“Hmm.”

Drew kisses her neck, bites it gently and says, "Slip one finger in, slowly."

When she does, Drew soothes the tense muscles in her thighs and whispers comforting words in her ear. When she slides it out a bit and starts a steady rhythm, Drew’s hands move to cup Nell’s breasts, pushing them up and squeezing softly, making Nell feel owned.

“Another,” Drew instructs. “Go a bit faster.”

Nell closes her eyes and lets her body relax completely in Drew’s hold, her focus shifts completely to the fingers she’s fucking into herself, feeling out her pleasure, noticing what works and doesn’t.

She tilts her head to the side in the hopes that Drew connects her lips to her skin once more and smiles once she does, but bites her lip when Drew’s hand covers her own and starts controlling the speed of her thrusts, her thumb finding a way to simultaneously tease and torture her swollen clit until Nell’s whining fills the room.

Drew sucks a bruise onto the juncture between her neck and shoulder and starts whispering in Nell’s ear again.

“You look so good like this, sweetheart. I wish you could see yourself. You’re sex on legs on a normal day but like this? Your perky little tits, sweat dripping down your skin, and your wet, sloppy cunt that’s made to be fucked... Can you feel it building, baby?”

“Yeah,” Nell moans, linking the fingers of her hand that isn’t occupied with Drew’s, gripping tightly as she can feel pressure building deep down. “Think I’m close.”

“You’re doing so good. You want me to take over?”

Nell mewls, nods shakily and breathes a heavy sigh of relief as Drew’s fingers replace her own and plunge inside until Drew increases the rhythm and the feeling of pressure builds and builds more. It starts feeling strange, out of place but not bad, entirely. She’s not completely sure.

“Drew,” she says, suddenly panicking a little, eyes wide open. “I don’t think— I feel like—”

“You gonna come for me?”

“Wait—”

But it’s too late, Drew’s fingers haven’t stopped and the building pressure wants to erupt, and somehow Drew seems to have noticed too, because she slides her fingers out only for a sudden stream of wetness to shoot out of her.

“Fuck!”

Nell doesn’t have a second to comprehend what’s happening to her body before Drew’s hand is moving side to side so fast, and it makes the stream go harder, makes her scream and clench on nothing until it goes again, and once again before she shakily grabs Drew’s hand to make her stop because she can’t fucking breathe.

Nell inhales sharply and shudders. “What— What the fuck just happened?”

Drew turns Nell’s face so she can kiss her open-mouthed, tongues sloppily twisting together.

“That was amazing,” she says, foreheads resting against each other. “You looked so pretty squirting for me. How do you feel?”

“I—” Nell is out of breath. “I don’t...understand what just happened, holy shit.”

“I can’t believe this is the first time this has happened for you, I’m so glad I was here to see it.” Drew noses against Nell’s temple. “You did so well.”

“Fuck,” Nell chuckles and leans her head back on Drew’s shoulder. “Just… Fuck.”

“Do you want to go for another?”

“Jesus Christ, I feel like I’m going to vibrate out of my skin, don’t you dare,” Nell laughs. “I feel like a wrung-out rag.”

“Gorgeous,” Drew says, lips pressed against Nell’s pulse point.

“Filthy,” Nell complains.

There’s come dripping down her legs, sprayed onto her thighs, the entire bed is so wet Nell is embarrassed just looking at it. Drew helps her stand up after a few minutes and makes sure she makes it to the bathroom in one piece.

Drew keeps watch as Nell showers and mopes when she won’t join her. 

They take off the sheets and air out the mattress, relocating to the living room where Drew lays down on the couch and Nell lays down on Drew.

* * *

They eat, at some point. Get rid of the old cocoa mugs and make new ones. Drew mocks her choice of vanilla ice cream when she sees the melted pot in the sink, Nell flicks her forehead and grins when Drew’s hands find their way to her butt, tugging her closer for more kisses.

They watch reruns of old tv shows while snuggled up against each other, blankets and pillows haphazardly around them and it’s so cozy and domestic, Nell can’t think of the last time she was this happy.

They order take out and only put on clothes to open the door. 

It’s dark outside when Nell stops paying attention to whatever’s on the tv screen and starts slyly glancing at Drew, her body stretched out and ready to be worshipped, and Nell  _ wants _ .

She starts slow, landing a simple kiss on Drew’s neck. Another, then, a little longer, a little harder. Some teeth, some suction. A groan that makes Nell lick over the mark she left. She moves back to find Drew’s eyes on her, dark and pupils dilated. It’s the boost she needs to shift to the floor and kneel between Drew’s legs, keeping eye contact with her the whole time, making sure it’s all okay. Drew’s only reaction is a raised eyebrow, a challenge almost.

Nell sighs and whimpers at the sight of Drew’s magnificent thighs around her, can’t help herself but turn her head and attach her lips to the skin of Drew’s inner thigh, loving the way it gives, the way it feels as she brings her hand up and squeezes.

She mouths at the skin, nips and bites and soothes the marks. Licks small stripes up her leg and moans when she occupies her lips with her skin again. She tastes so good, so right. Her eyes roll to the back of her skull when Drew’s hand lands in her hair, tugging gently to let her know she’s there.

She’s sure she must look like a horny mess, panting heavily between Drew’s legs, eyes half-lidded with pleasure, but Drew doesn’t speak so she switches to give her other leg the same treatment. She feels slight tremors in the skin against her lips, telling her how sensitive Drew must be there and dives in with renewed effort, sucking marks onto the skin, licking, worshipping.

“Nell,” Drew croaks above her, and Nell moans because  _ she did that _ , with just her mouth.

She doesn’t say anything else, but the fingers in Nell’s hair tighten and pull her head forward as Drew shifts on the couch and shuffles forward, bringing her ass to the edge and her covered pussy to Nell’s face.

With her arms still holding on tight to Drew’s thighs, Nell buries her face and mouths at Drew’s lips through the cotton of her panties. She licks a long line up the wet fabric, attaches her lips to where she knows Drew’s clit is, and sucks.

She enjoys the way everything grows wetter, enjoys the taste of Drew, the way she lifts her hips a little as Nell slides her ruined panties down. She enjoys the way Drew’s hand on her head guides her, brings her mouth to Drew’s lips and finally, Nell can really dive in. She sticks her tongue out to tease lightly, but that doesn’t last long as Drew pulls her closer and Nell gladly slips her tongue inside, slides it all across, circles Drew’s clit, anything that gets a reaction out of her.

Her lips, loose and wet, slide wherever Drew wants her until eventually Nell just sticks her tongue out and Drew uses her face as she sees fit. She holds onto Drew’s thighs for dear life, groans into Drew’s skin when possible and relishes the moans that follow. Drew’s thighs tighten around Nell’s head, and Nell has never felt so content. Being surrounded like this is everything she’s ever needed.

“I—” Drew starts above her, and Nell looks up at her from her place between her legs, licking her pussy, sucking her clit, maintaining eye contact.

“Hmm,” Nell moans and continues her ministrations.

“I’m going to come,” Drew says and starts widening her thighs again, seemingly giving Nell a way out, but Nell squeezes Drew’s thighs harder and dives back in, focussing all her efforts on Drew’s swollen clit now, pausing every now and then to lick across her entrance.

Drew moans above her and Nell pinches her every time she dares to look away from her.

Drew’s hips start moving in little upthrusts, and then suddenly still while Drew keens above her, not screaming but not quiet either, and Nell doesn’t stop licking until she gets pushed off, Drew’s come dripping down her chin.

She starts adding some more mouth-shaped bruises on Drew’s thighs while she recovers.

“So,” Nell says, trying and failing to hide her pleased grin. “How did I do?”

Drew’s fingers push some hair behind Nell’s ear and she tugs gently at her earlobe.

“You’re a fucking brat.”

“Hmm,” Nell smiles. “I think you like that.”

The corner of Drew’s mouth lifts and Nell moves only to settle down in Drew’s lap.

They move towards each other and connect lips in the middle, nipping and soothing bites, sucking tongues, getting lost in each other.

* * *

It’s nearing midnight when they decide to face reality and admit that the day can’t last forever. Drew has to go home to take care of her cat, and Nell… Well, Nell needs to do a lot of laundry, for one thing.

“Drew,” she whispers, head tucked under Drew’s chin.

“Hmm?”

“I know you need to go…” She fiddles with Drew’s fingers, turning them this way and that, exposing her nerves. “It’s just that… I don’t really want you to.”

She laughs to hide how serious she is. 

“Isn’t that silly?” She smiles, and even though Drew can’t see it, she knows she wouldn’t believe her anyway.

“I do need to leave,” Drew says, and Nell’s heart sinks. She lifts Nell’s chin to make her look up. “Do you need to stay?”

“Uh.” Nell sits up dizzyingly fast. “No.”

Drew shrugs and just looks at her.

“This could be a very bad idea,” Nell says, actively working against herself now. “You’re gonna get so tired of me.”

Instead of entertaining Nell’s pessimism, Drew just says. “Maybe. Won’t it be better to know sooner than later?”

Nell nods shakily, still not sure how things ended up here, how she ended up having this all.

“You wanna come home with me?” Drew asks. “You wanna pet my kitty?”

Nell blushes, just as Drew intended given her smirk.

“Such a dirty mind,” Drew teases. 

“You’re a monster.”

“Yes,” Drew says. “Let’s go pack you a bag.”

* * *

Drew’s cat doesn’t give a shit about Nell when they enter the apartment, so Nell makes it her life mission to earn their affection.

The next morning, Nell sends a selfie of her and Drew in bed to Kevin, wishing him a happy new year.

A few minutes later there’s a response. A picture of Kevin looking sheepish but happy in between his two boyfriends.  _ Took you two long enough _ , the next message says.

Drew moves to take the phone from where she was slowly waking up next to her and she types out, 

_ Get fucked, Kevin <3 _

_ Enthusiastically, _

_ the superior power couple. _

**Author's Note:**

> (*) so attached in fact, that i'm already working on a pwp sequel
> 
> shout at me on [twitter!](http://twitter.com/neilmoony)  
> 


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